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"Adulthood"

 Thursday, December 9, 2010

When exactly do you become a "Adult"?? I mean, do you go to sleep a child and one day wake up a adult? Or is it more of a feeling? Certain age? A State of Mind?

As I sat in the kitchen drinking my morning coffee, mentally going over the things in my head that need to be done for the day...the week..the month. What bills need to paid this week...Who's gift I still to need to buy...Laundry that needs to be washed...Floors that need to be swept and mopped..and the list can go on and on and on...I pondered this question...

In all aspects and definition of the word..this is "adulthood"!

So why don't I feel like a adult?? Often times, when I look in the mirror I feel like a little girl playing house..

I can think back to when I was little, I would sit back, watch, listen, and analyze (and yes for those of you that know me quite well...I even analyzed everything when I was little)  the grown ups...they seem so confident..so sure of themselves and what they were doing and what had to be done. When I asked a question..they never hesitated and always had a answer for everything. It seemed like they knew just endless amounts of information..like they were just waiting for a little mind like you to ask so they could pass on the information...Supper was always on the table (and most of the time..to your complete surprise it was almost always one of your favorites)..the house was almost always spotless...the shoes you needed for cheerleading and the pom poms you needed magically appeared when you needed them...and all the while the grown up or "Adults" never lost their sense of composure or confidence...

I am 27 year's old...been married to my husband for 5 years...and became a mother 9 years ago...I am unsure of most of the choices I make...I struggle at giving Khristian the answers to the questions that he so randomly askes...I stress from month to month over the bills and how we are going to pay for Khristian's multiple array of activities...Worry about not having enough time to keep the house clean and getting supper on the table...I struggle to find the perfect balance between alone time and family time..and when the 30th or 31st of the month comes I breathe a huge sigh of relief and tell myself I have made it through another month...and then the very next day the lists start all over again...

When your little, you always have that one person that you look up to more so than anyone else..you say "I want to be just like them when I grow up and become a adult!"

As you grow just a bit older and you mature..you say "When I am a adult, I am NEVER going to be that way!"

So...What I'm asking is...When do we make the transition from child to adolescent to Adult?? Is it when we move out on our own? When we get married? Have kids???

My thoughts - I don't think any of us are adults...I don't think we ever really grow up....

I think we are all just a massive bunch of kids..playing house and dress-up..scrambleing around in this playhouse that we call the world just trying to survive! We make the best out of a situation and we sometimes come out the winner..and sometimes we come out the loser...maybe we don't always have the right answer..maybe the house isnt always clean and sometimes that bill will not get paid by the 10th of the month...but as long as we keep laughing, stay true to our heart and we stay true to ourselves...We are all going to be just fine... =)

1 comments:

Gere Spivey December 9, 2010 at 2:28 PM  

Who would have thought that playing house would be so tough sometimes?

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